THE FISH THAT CAME BACK TO LIFE DURING FISH AND CHIPS

Once upon a time, down in the dining room, whilst I tucked into my fish and chips the fish came to life and tried to jump off the plate.
In fact, as I put a piece of fish into my mouth it started to wriggle and bit my tongue. Luckily I grew a new tongue as the fish started to eat my other tongue.
I spat the fish out of my mouth, but it just jumped up to my face and bit me. Other people also noticed something unusual about the fish coming back to life whilst being served. For instance, one resident started to scream as the fish served with the chips tried to eat the chips that were served with the fish. Not only that, the fish went mad and flew up to the resident's face and ate his nose.

The shop from where the fish and chips was bought from had an oven. Even there something went wrong. As the fish was being roasted it started to jump up and kicked the oven door open, desperate to escape the searing heat as it was being roasted. The fish went for the chef and bit him all over, just one more case of food going mad as it came from animals.

Even butchers weren't immune from fish and meat coming back to life.

In one butcher's shop a piece of steak attacked the butcher just as he was about to cut it up.  Armed with a broom he tried to fend the mad steak off, for the steak  went absolutely berserk and kept on biting the butcher. Pc Bighead came into the shop to see what it was all about, but, as he was about to investigate the steak suddenly devoured him, the first recorded case of a piece of meat suddenly turning into a man - eater.

After the steak ate the policeman it then turned on the butcher and made a meal of him.