THE DAY I WOKE UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE'S LEGS

One morning I woke up with legs that didn't belong to me. Someone must of burst into my flat in the middle of the night and stole my legs.
It happened whilst I was fast asleep, for the other tenant who lives here took off my legs, then his and swapped them over after bursting into my flat with a master key that he stole from the office. It only came to light when the support worker rang my flat and was shocked to find strange legs on my body as I was wearing shorts at the time.

"I know whose legs they are said the support worker, because I can recognize them by the fact that you don't have legs like that. For a start your legs aren't as big or as long as that.

I told the support worker that it happened last night whilst I was asleep, which meant that I would have been unaware of the theft of my own legs.
Some person must of burst into my own flat in the middle of the night and swapped his legs for mine.

"Right, 'I'm going to report it and have to call a meeting."

The support  worker did however notice that the master key was missing from the office and was thinking of calling the police, but that would be after the meeting.

At the meeting a lot of people came and were told that someone who lives here has been going around stealing other peoples' limbs and heads because for what I can see from here in this room are a few tenants who have the wrong heads.

The manager who was chairing the meeting did notice that a couple of men had women's heads fixed onto their necks, even one man with two noses. Because of this one tenant has had to go around complaining that someone has stolen her nose and has a hole where her nose should be.

The body stealing ruffian was amongst the people in the meeting.

"I'm afraid said the manager that I'm  going to have to call the police in order to track down the culprit who has been swapping over other peoples' limbs, noses and heads and transplanting them into the bodies of other tenants who live here, even transplanting the body parts that he stole onto his own body."

The police were called and with dogs tracked  down the culprit. It was Steven Outhouse. He was told to return the body parts he stole from other tenants and give them back to them.
It was he who stole the master key because he owned up.

In the end I got my own legs back and made my way back upstairs to my own flat, only to find that it had gone.
Steven Outhouse must have got hold of the flat and flushed it down the toilet, because he said so.

Staff broke into the toilet near the dining room and found it was blocked and overflowing. They pulled out the object that was blocking up the toilet and found that it was one of the flats in my own home; no wonder the toilet was blocked up because Steven Outhouse flushed it down the toilet whilst no one was looking. The police arrested him and took him to Goodmayes Hospital where he got sectioned.
In the end he had to be moved to a care home.